Okay.

I miss writing. I write about writing, I constantly think about writing, I just can't actually DO IT for some reason. I just keep putting it off, thinking, I'll do it tomorrow, but I never actually get around to it. I need to make it a priority.

Seriously, it's pathetic what I spend my days doing now. Waiting. Constantly waiting for something, anything to happen, instead of actually going out and finding something. It seemed like, once I finished my story and stopped writing, my purpose was stripped from me, and I'm nothing without it.

But I'm so intimidated by this idea I have, the only idea I want to work on right now. I know it's gonna take a lot of work, and I'm afraid that once I start, I'll give up a few weeks into it because I don't have a deadline, like I did while I was working on NaNo. I suppose I could give myself a deadline?

I really should work on editing BH first, but I honestly don't really give a fuck anymore. I'm okay with it going unedited because I don't plan on doing anything with it but using it as something to look back on in a few years. It will remain untouched if I don't work on it now. I think I'm okay with that.

Back to giving myself a deadline, I don't know if that'll work, but I can try. It's worth a try.


I don't knooooooowwwwww. I don't want to think anymore tonight. I just want to crawl into bed and sleep for a good 24 hours or so. That'd be good.

I'm not feeling my best today.