Tense.

After the past two nights, I shouldn't be nervous or afraid anymore, but I can't really help it.


Where has my head been? I haven't written about anything. Thanksgiving was decent. I spent most of my day clinging to my brother like I was six years old again. I don't know why. He keeps me safe, and I know that he has problems being around a lot of people, too. It's comforting. He's very sweet to me now, which makes me feel guilty for wanting to strangle him as often as I do.

A few days ago, I was being a bitch to him. A sad look came over his face, and he asked, "Why are you being so mean today?"

I immediately softened up, told him I was sorry, and tried to keep myself from acting like that anymore.

I think it was just the fact that I'd spent so much time with him, and I needed space, because after being gone for a little over a day, I was excited to see him when he came over today.


Christmas sucks, I'll pass this year.